WHAT IF...

DISCLAIMER – This is a college magazine article; so, if at times, it sounds patronizing with vague and generic statements, please know that I didn’t intend it to be so. Again, apologies for the minuscule amounts of actually experimented physics and cosmic amounts of incoherent speculation. Kindly do not focus on the massive length of the write-up. I was asked to write 1500 words for the article, but simply ran out of stuff to rant, thank heavens! :-D

I bet there’s not one among us who hasn’t explored the intricacies of “WHAT IF”. Wouldn’t it be the most fascinating discovery of the millennium if you or I discovered the time machine?

We’d sure as hellfire not go to 802702 A.D like some other dolts in the past. We are way cooler than that! The possibilities are many. Like for example, why should Mr. X get the credit for inventing the time machine in 2078 A.D? Why don’t I go back to 1990 and gift myself the formula for time travel, making me the greatest theoretical physics genius of the 1900s and giving me the fascinating distinction of being the first ‘minor’ to win the Nobel Prize! Or else why not invest 1 pound in the Royal Bank of England in 1500 AD under my name? The compounded growth of my petty investment would have made me a billionaire by the time I was born!

But I digress.

I BELIEVE that we need not go looking for answers to the ancient question of time travel to Einstein.

I think we have all that we need, right here in our heads! I say TIME TRAVEL can happen in our minds itself! For those who have started shaking their heads in disgust, let me offer you a simple argument; none of us know the full extent and the limit of the power of the mind, so how can one be so sure that such qualities don’t exist? The enormous untapped power of the DNA computer stands testimony to the limitless power of the most complex machine known to man – the human brain!

Let us examine some details. All of us have felt intuition and instinct. What if tell you now these phenomena are nothing but the mind’s abilities to travel into the future? You may also have realized that in many cases, logic, reasoning and intelligence may fail but instincts and intuition never fails, though many of us fail to interpret it. Then why is one unable to experience such phenomena at all the times? Who knows? It may be that these phenomena require and consume enormous amounts of energy and since we have stopped on our daily dose of Horlicks, these ‘flashes’ come only during important tasks, like while taking important decisions and so on.

Now let’s think about memory. Let me see if I can put forth that memory is nothing but our mind’s ability to travel into the past!
Here’s an example. You must have visited a waterfall. Picture it in your mind.

Okay? Now read on…. You may just want to remember the water in the falls. But I bet that you’ve pictured the entire panorama. You have also visualized the surrounding rocks, the trees et al. Inconclusive enough you say? How about this time, you force yourself to remember only the water falling. Don’t you still remember the whole picture including the moron who kept coming in the way while you were trying to take a snap? How about this then?

I now ask you to remember a person of your choice. I doubt highly that you’ve got just the face of that person. It will always be accompanied by the background - the memory of the place from where you have actually remembered the person!

We also know that conservation of energy is the ultimate goal of any natural system. Assuming memory to be bits and bytes of photons and electrical impulses and the brain to be a processor following our conventional understanding of how a processor could work, then why should the brain allow wastage of energy by returning useless bits of energy like the rocks, flowers and that moron blocking your view, when the water falling to ground is all you want to remember, especially when conservation of energy is the law of the nature. Let’s see if we can work this out…
I say that when you tried to remember the water falls, a series of very complex processes which I don’t profess to understand has ensued. Any incident is stored not as a complete video/image representation but as a memory address location of that particular incident or a marker, something similar to the Paging concept present in the Operating System of any computer. First, for retrieving the information, the mind picks up this marker and actually travels back in time and then imprints a temporary, erasable picture of that ‘incident’ in some part of the brain. This is comparable to a photo film. This ‘picture’ is then processed by the brain and perceived as memory.

Every event in your life has some kind of a ‘log’ akin to the Paging concept again! I prefer to call it an “event address”. Sometimes the address the address of a particular event gets lost!? Quite natural actually. So when you try to remember that particular event, the mind is lost without the log and it aimlessly remembers all other ‘events’, which may or may not be concerned with the event it ‘wants’ to remember. This can be particularly irksome at times when it happens during all ungodly hours (like remembering your favourite song in the middle of an exam).[All of you must have felt it ‘coz I certainly have]. That can be explained as the reason to why we don’t remember everything.

Conditioned actions do not require memory because it has been conditioned (or fed) into the conscious brain. The abilities that I spoke of purely subconscious. You might realize that I always spoke of the ‘mind’ while referring to them as not as the brain. That’s exactly the reason why one never remembers how to walk, to bicycle, to tie a lace and so on.
While writing exams, there’s too much to remember so memory is not a good option (Remember the energy factor). Ergo, we must study so hard that the exam matter becomes a conditioned action, thus improving our result. (I’ve tried to keep this statement as non-condescending as possible).

Just think about it, there’s so much we commit to memory; so many names, so many phone numbers, so many faces, so many places…even if every morsel of information is attributed a bit of energy (photon), our brain would become unstable with the accumulating information. This would ultimately lead to a startling conclusion that there is a limit to what one can learn! (i.e. till the energy level in the brain just reaches the threshold unstable level). What a fine excuse science has given to the lazy Joe!! C’MON MOM, if I study even 1 word more, my brain will explode).

But you might tell me that we need to remember the logs that I spoke of. Well, remembering logs is better than remembering kilobytes of pictures and information, don’t you think? Still, even if our mind doesn’t work in terms of bits and bytes, there must some way in which our brain stores information, which science would be able to explain. OR we may have to invent a new branch of science or invent new mathematics to describe the wonderful phenomenon that our mind is. But first, we must try to pose questions and find answers, get curious. After all, all major scientific discoveries and inventions have arisen out of curiosity. As a parting thought, don’t forget, remember to remember!

CS Strategy Guide

Hi there,
Here’s a strategy guide on Counter Strike based on my experience. Hope you’ve had a look at my previous article on CS in general at A Tribute to CS

DISCLAIMER:

• Please note that all ideas, tactics, thoughts and strategies in this article are purely IMO and are a result of my gaming experience alone!
• Secondly, this article is mainly for those who have had CLAN match experience and have mastered their basics. You will neither come across elementary tips like “Hold the crosshair near the head region to get a better kill” nor will you find intermediate assistance like recoil control of the CV (AK-47) or to “look away when the flash grenade is thrown” or about “wall-banging” or “spamming” as it is lovingly called. I’m assuming you know all this!
• This article is mainly based on CS: 1.6. References can probably be drawn to CS: Condition Zero and Source.

In case anybody feels the need to modify the strategies according to their game play, please do so and if you feel something blatantly wrong with my way of thinking, do let me know.

Well, moving on with the article at hand, here are certain things that I have noticed over the time I have been in this love-affair with the game.
There are thousands of good players in the game. And by good, I mean skill-wise. But most of us treat CS as a game, which automatically puts it in second gear. Finding a clan, getting into a groove with each other and going pro by looking for sponsors etc. is a tedious job which requires dedication and commitment which few of us are prepared to put. That’s probably the reason why we find so few pro-gamers who make it big and more so, in India, where the unconventional is considered taboo!
Still, there are many who play really well, but encounter an occasional ass-whopping now and then, and are unable to know what went wrong! You may find a couple of thoughts here worthwhile and put them to use.

Allow me to go with the flow. Let’s first analyze a couple of common scenarios I’ve encountered while playing.

• Firstly, a team should have a captain. Not in the strictest sense of the word, but rather an in-game leader with the best ‘game-sense’ in the squad who is capable of giving sensible orders. Once the leader has been decided, know that his one decision can change the outcome of a round and in turn change the course of the game. I'm sure all of us know this, but still, we falter. Why? When the leader calls (preferably ASAP), the team SHOULD listen to his orders and act accordingly. It should not happen that the leader calls for an ‘eco’ round and one smartass volunteers, “But I’ve already purchased a sniper rifle!”
  

• This can be achieved in many ways. One way which I prefer and is followed by many pros is that the team quickly broadcast their financial position in the beginning of the round curtly like “5k” or "3500" or so and the leader can in turn make a quick decision. Some of the general orders by the leader are “Buy up”, “DA”(Deagle [Desert Eagle] and Armor), “eco” in terms of economics.
  

• The details of the in-game movement/flanking/complex team strategies should never be decided over the course of the game and should always be pre-decided. This will reduce the burden on the already over-taxed leader!
  

• Speaking of natural strategies, grenading is of primary importance in the game. A great CS player can be identified by the nades he throws. A semi pro team that played against Team 3d was interviewed in WSVG LANWar and they said what distinguished them from Team 3D was not much in the skill department but in the perfectly co-ordinated strategies and the precise throwing of the nades and the flashes. The opposition’s movement was greatly hampered by the incoming flashes. Never underestimate the power of nades. Smoke grenade is optional and depends on the captain’s strategy but two flashes and one HE-grenade are a must in every round unless the captain says “buy-up” and you don’t have money for both a primary weapon and nades.
  

• As you play, you will realize that secondary weapons (pistols) can be turned into powerful killing objects in the hands of an expert but nades cannot be replaced. Gun economics are team specific and captain should co-ordinate, but contrary to popular opinion, nades are as important as are the guns.
  

• So in general, all necessities (like combinations of AK/M4+2 Flash+1 He-grenade+armor and other variations) can be bound to specific keys. For this you will have to prepare scripts for binding keys to specific tasks. You don’t have to sweat it. There are countless readymade scripts available for free on the net (http://www.counterscript.net/ for example) and you can bind the keys accordingly with minor changes or none. This will save lots of time during the freezetime which can be used for strategizing.
  

• I have seen many cases where a person has $10000 while his teammate is an employee of an Indian software company (read - penniless!). CS is all about teamwork. Never hoard in any round. If you have killed four opponents in the previous round, you will undoubtedly have gotten more money than your teammates in this round. Buy up for your teammates instead of hoarding for the subsequent rounds. A team with two Famas(Clarion) guns is better than a team with a Maverick(M4/Colt) and a pistol only!
  

• Continuing from the previous point, if you want a weapon from your teammate, simply asking him should be augmented by making some symbol in the game, by say, jumping up and down or repeatedly operating your flash-light. This will help your teammate locate you in the game and can throw the weapon in your direction, thus eliminating the need to run back to collect the weapon. This point may look elementary now, but it’s of infinite importance in a Terrorist rush when speed and reaching the bombsite first is of utmost importance.

Alright, enough of economics, here are some general thoughts.

• Many people(including me) have begun with CS:Condition Zero and since, the pros deal only with CS1.6 (for a number of reasons which I’ll say later), the CS 1.6 gun ‘lingo’ has to be adapted. So here’s a quick walkthrough of CS terms w.r.t general terms!
  M4 = M4A1 = Colt = Maverick ( B -> 4 -> 3 of CTs)
  CV = CV47 = AK47(although CV is used in CZ too)
  Famas = Clarion ( B -> 4 -> 1 of CTs)
  Galil = IDF Defender ( B -> 4 -> 1 of CTs)
  Steyr AUG = Bullpup ( B -> 4 -> 4 of CTs)
  AWP = Arctic Warfare Police(Rifle) = Magnum Sniper Rifle
  

• One thing I’ve noticed is a learning curve in CS that follows the graph of series resonance! Let me explain. In the beginning, you take time to shoot at a person even if he is standing in front of you. As we gain more experience, we develop itchy trigger-fingers and shoot at the very first person we see, resulting in several team kills too! But as you go pro, you learn pro and realize that in CS, shooting a guy, even an enemy, is not always the best option.
  This theory should not be pushed to its limits like what SK SpaWn did in CPL Winter 2005***(please look at the bottom of the article), but there are times when you need not shoot an enemy too.
  
  For example, if you are well-concealed and are waiting for the opponents, don’t start shooting at the first person u see.. This way, you might get one guy at the most, but the others will hunt you down because of your reload etc. Remember, people generally (especially Terrorists) come in packs. Only international pro level go single to separate places because they have the skill to go solo….So even if one guy comes, contrary to what your trigger-itchy fingers tell you, wait. Let 2-3 guys pass you, they wont see you coz you are hidden, and then start shooting. This makes more game sense.
  

• I am not a great sniper. I am above average and used to be good, but I got so accustomed to assault weapons and became a better assaulter through practice and worse at sniping realizing that assaulting is what I like! So, I have realized that we need to play only with what we are comfortable with. If you feel you are good at assault, do not practice sniping just to become better at it. Get better at assault.
  

• Having said this, when it comes to sniping, if enemy is close we generally switch to secondary weapon; this is what we generally do. I’m not asking you stop that, but now, if you haven’t done it yet, try adapting to giving unzoomed shots, it works many times, though not perfectly accurate as the scoped shot, it will hit roughly in the center area which is more than enough at close range. This type of single-shot-kill is more effective than switching to secondary where you need many pistol shots to kill the opponent.
  

Well, that’s it for now I guess. I made this article quite elementary and borderline intermediate level. I’ll be back with more complex (and probably more useful!) T and CT specific strategies. Hope this was useful to you. Till then, take care!

***Full marks to SK_Spawn fro his brilliant performance in CPL Winter 2005, which is considered by many to be last great CS tournament which had the best teams from all over the world. After this, unfortunately, America fell to the CS : Source marketing wave. Anyways, Spawn shone in the eyes of the world for his brilliant ninja style defuse in De_Cbble map against Swedish powerhouse NiP, where he, as CT, almost defuses the bomb with 4 Terrorists still alive in the opposition guarding it! The 1 Vs. 4 eco klutch round of Spawn versus Begrip Gaming in De_Train map is also a visual treat.

A Tribute to CS

Hey there,
A couple of my friends have been asking me why I haven’t come up with any article on one of my longstanding passions, the best game in the world – Counter Strike, which got me into thinking that though there are a million strategy guides and articles on the game, a very select few deal with the tactics and game control on an advanced level. So here’s my contribution to the phenomenon called Counter Strike.

First off, let me say something about the beautiful game itself! I won’t be saying anything more clichéd other than “CS is a tactical first-person shooter which is a Half-Life Mod, developed by by Minh "Gooseman" Le and Jess "Cliffe" Cliffe, blah blah blah”.

But you will appreciate the beauty of the game when you realize how such a simple game, which demands so less from your hardware so that you can effortlessly run it on a 1.5GHz processor system, and which has such a simple game-plan that the Counter-Terrorist must prevent the Terrorist from planting the bomb, became the most-played multiplayer game in the world.
The phenomenon of CS has permeated into the world so much that it is said that at any given point of time, you will be playing along with 70 thousand people all across the world, albeit, on different servers( Source : Internet. Website: Forgotten. Sorry!). Valve did good to remove VIP Assassination and Hostage-Rescue maps from the international competition scene as they made the game too side intensive.

The beauty of the game can also be seen in the bugs or glitches in CS like spamming(shooting through walls), fast switch etc, that deviates this from real world shooting, but in turn serves the purpose of rather separating the newbies(noobs) from the semi pros and the semi pros from the pros.

In the beginning , the game appears to be a mindless shooting game like the other scores of clones it has spawned, but as we delve deeper into the game and go into clan level, we see that the game is less about skill (at the higher level) and more about careful planning, strategies and precise teamwork. In the words of CoL St0rm, you need to know your teammates and your opponents as well very closely if you need to turn the game in your favor.
A team with high skill and excellent strategy can overcome a team of extraordinarily gifted players who do not know each other’s strengths and weaknesses. This is where teamwork shines in CS, making CS different from the other FPS games in the market.

Finally, here’s my tribute to the greatest game in the world.

The place has been set. The plans have been made. The battle lines have been drawn. The time is now. Chaos shall reign supreme. Governments shall bow down to their demands. The world you wish to live in shall cease to exist. The awesome power of destruction will be unleashed. But You will stand against them. You will foil their plans. You will destroy the destroyers. You will rid the world of the harbingers of terror. You are the Hero. You are the Counter Terrorist.

You walk amidst ‘dust’ and the grime to outsmart the enemy. You pillage the ‘Aztec’ gold with glee. The tall bastions of castle ‘Cobblestone’ stand testament to your stealth and guile. The dark and musty corners in the ‘train’ yard are your companions as you move towards your destiny. The sound of your gunshot inspires awe and respect in the eyes of the enemy as they wistfully try to trap you in the ‘dust too’. Governments and people alike look at you with fear and trepidation as you threaten to go ‘nuke’lear on them. You are indomitable. Your thirst for chaos is unquenchable. You will not rest until you succeed in your quest. You are the Terrorist.

GO! GO! GO!

Harry's Big Fight!!!

Prologue:
Vivek “Check EETS” B.S. fell headlong into hot thick soup when he stood up to his Project Manager, Mr. Sal-rukh Khan, when the latter dumped him with more work and Vivek bravely refused. One thing led to another, and out of the blue, his PM decided that threats would intimidate Check EETS into taking care of the extra work. So, Sal-rukh Khan used his considerable clout and called the services of the now-bankrupt, former Super-Heavyweight boxer Mike Tyson in order to cower Check EETS into submission. But Cheki displayed his indomitable spirit when he was steadfast to his position, although amidst trepidation, he enlisted the protection of his friend, The ‘Widowmaker’ against the marauding ear-biter.
Now, Tyson knows his opponent, but is cocky about his prowess, but the Widowmaker isn’t aware of his opponent and agrees to battle it out with “He-who-troubles-Check EETS”.

Present:
[Narrator] (voice booming over the microphone) – Good Afternoon folks! We are LIVE outside the main gate of the Mysore Infosys Campus for today’s momentous match! Hello and welcome…I’m Narr Ator……

[Man] – ……….And I’m Narun Ayar joining him for what promises to be a treat for the bloodthirsty among us! In fact, whoever comes out on top today, it's the audience who wins! Please note that the bets are to be placed at the main gate security counter and proceeds from the bets will help the company in its new Software Development training plan package -“Campus Connect for Toddlers”! Several of them are in the audience today!

[Toddlers] *Wave and cheer*

[Narrator] (Snatching the mike back and harshly whispering) – Hey, what is this? Why are you reporting this fight? Shouldn’t you actually be EARNING your salary by working?

[Narun Ayar a.k.a. N.A] (harshly whispering back) – Hey, now look here. I don’t see any ID tag around you. I wonder how entered the premises in the first place! So, I either report you to security OR we both be civil and you hand me that spare mike over there…

[Narrator] (loudly clearing his throat) - ….Anyways, here comes our contestants! Walking down the road towards our left is Harry! Amazingly, we see a mask around Harry’s head! Is he cocky enough to take on Tyson blindly or is this a brilliant ploy from Check EETS so as to keep Harry from getting intimidated by his opponent!

[Narahari] (rolling his fists into balls) - It's Clobbering time!

[Narrator] - I’m afraid that didn’t sound mean enough, coming from your plump and cherubic face, Mr. Narahari. If you could be so kind as to be gruffer…

[Harry](clearing throat, practicing a couple of times and bellowing) – IT’S CLOBBERING TIME!

[Narrator] – That’s better. But I’m afraid we’ll first have to check with Marvel Comics to see if you are allowed to use the Fantastic Four phrase so shamelessly in public. But moving on……
Here we see the ‘Baddest man on the Planet’ in flesh, to our right as Mike Tyson comes ambling along with his perpetual mean frown. Notice how the entire crowd is taking one step back in fear and awe! Come to think of it, he doesn’t look as big as we think of him to be. Could it happen that Harry could actually clinch…Mr. Ayar! Why are you slinking away? Don’t tell me you are afraid of the ear-biter!!!

[N.A] – Nonsense! Well, coming back to the topic. It’s true! The boxer hunk looks puny in front of the Design Engineer from P.L.E.S!! As a wise man once said, the strong baboon is nothing compared to the weak but skilled baboon who will make coconut chutney of the others ass, steal his girlfriend and crash his Ferrari as well as trashing his house. In other words, Narahari, though not the fighting kind, might have a chance if he played to his strengths!
Well, here are some stats that I dug up from The Encyclopedia Galactica and The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy!

[CLICK IMAGE TO ENLARGE]

[Narrator] – Well folks, that gives you an overview into the two contestants! But, I too dug up some specific info on the two fighters. Here they are -
[CLICK IMAGE TO ENLARGE]

So there you have it people, the boxer might have the odds tilted in his favour, but Narahari, with his ‘Belly Thrust’, and by putting the advantage he gains through superior height and weight, can curb the ego and eventually go on to defeat Mike Tyson himself!!! The fighters are moving ……………

[Harry] – HOLD IT!!!! Who did you say my opponent was?!?!?!

[N.A] – It’s the Kid Dynamite! It’s the American Bad-ass! It’s Mike Tyson, my friend!

[Harry] (removing his mask with shock) – Oh My God! It IS true! Cheki, how could you not tell me man! I shall shave your head once this is over. I refuse to die! I refuse to fight Mike Tyson!

[Narrator] – Ah, Mr. Narahari…I’m afraid matters are a bit more complicated now. After having foolishly signed the iron-clad contract prepared by Check eets WITH the mask on, you are now compelled to fight the hulk OR listen to the endless tirades and ravings of Check EETS for the remainder of your life!

[Harry] – Oh, now that puts me in a very tight spot now, doesn’t it? Alright, I chose the first evil over the other. Let’s do this fight then! But give some time to call up my parents and friends to say Goodbye!

[N.A] – Do not lose hope my friend! [to Narr Ator] My gut tells me this fight will be over faster than a ‘session’ with a hooker!

[N.A] – Anyhoo, The Widowmaker and Mike are now in place for the fight. The crowd of interns, production folks and curious onlookers is wild, the cheerleaders are in place and we see the two contenders walking towards each other! Narahari has extended a hand of friendship to the mean-machine and surprisingly, we see Tyson accept it!!

[Narrator] – Ewww…looks like a tight grip ‘Iron’ Mike has on the design engineer! Harry won’t be able to open that jar of pickles at home for a couple of weeks!

[N.A] – Aw! That’s an unexpected uppercut from the gentle giant to Tyson. Tyson has suddenly let go of Hari’s hand! But he’s too cool, too cocky! He is evidently unaware of Harry’s signature thrust!

[Mike Tyson] – Hell, this is too easy! I’ll even give you the first shot! Take it, I promise you, it’ll be your last!

[N.A] – Narahari seems to be rushing towards his unmoving opponent and is now landing a swift volley of jabs, hooks, straight rights, uppercuts. I’m surprised at how a professional heavyweight fighter is having trouble resisting an untrained software engineer and even getting wobbled a few times!

[Narrator] – It’s been one whole minute of constant hammering on Tyson’s defenseless, muscled body and Mike now looks angry! Awwww…that’s a devastating right jab on Hari’s stomach! He seems to doubling over in pain! I wonder how anybody is letting this cruelty happen in the first place. Hey, did anybody order Pizza?

[N.A] – Stop that! It’s not funny! The Widowmaker seems to be barely recovering from the under-powered punch there. He is squinting his eyes in displeasure.

[Mike Tyson] – I’m just warming up punk! You are toast! muhuhahahahahahaha (continues laughing for some time)

[Narrator] – Harry has gone back a few steps. He seems to have recovered from the blow. What have we here! The two contenders are rushing towards each other! BAAAM!

[N.A] – What just happened? Where are the fighters? So much dust….Wait, you aren’t going to believe this! Mike Tyson is on the ground! There’s no need for a referee! He is K.O!!!

[Narrator] – And, Harry is stuttering. He looks like he’s been hit by a train! I don't think he knows who he is anymore! But amazingly, he is standing! Oh no, there he falls….And so, with this, there is no winner to the fight!!! The match has ended in a draw! This is mind-boggling! Well, here is our guest commentator, Mr. Albert Einstein, to clear all our doubts! What do you think happened, Albert?

[Einstein] – Well, things happened too fast, but I conjecture using basic principles of vector analysis and the General Theory of Relativity that Tyson’s 2600 lbs deadly ‘left jab’ exactly counter-acted with the grossly underrated 2365 lbs ‘Belly–thrust’ of the Widowmaker, and owing to Harry’s superior weight and momentum, it proved too much for the heavyweight champion and he was knocked out, but without being propelled into the air, while at the same time, Harry has been knocked clean too…

[Narrator] – Hope you guys followed that, coz I didn’t! Thanks anyway, Albert!
So there you have it folks! This match has resulted in a no-winner, but it surely will result in Check EETS being on bench for a longer period and Mr.Sal-rukh Khan not being able to do anything about it!
And once, the two fighters come out of coma, I’m sure they’ll extend their arms in friendship once again and this time, in earnest!
But before we leave, let’s mourn for a minute for Vivek B.S., the twisted soul who will be attacked by both the combatants once they wake up, leaving him paralyzed and with a shaven head, for having organized this stupid match and for having come up with this incredibly lame-ass write-up!!! So it’s Goodbye from me, Narr Ator!

[N.A] – And this is Narun Ayar signing off too, with the solemn promise from Check EETS that there won’t be any more such stupid match-ups or face-offs in the near-future! Thanks for your time! Au revoir!

Musings of a bored mind...

I was reading this book called "God's Debris" by Scott Adams( of Dilbert fame) and came across this very interesting point.
Imagine that you are omnipotent. You can do anything, create anything, be anything. As soon as you decide you want something, it becomes reality. Imagine that you are God.
A God would have no emotions, no fears, no desires, no curiosity, no hunger. Those are human shortcomings, not something that would be found in an omnipotent God. What then would motivate God? Maybe it’s the challenge, the intellectual stimulation in creating and destroying things. But, Omnipotence means that nothing is a challenge. And in knowing that everything is possible. What could stimulate the mind of someone who knows everything and more importantly, knows that it can do everything? That it can perform every task?
This may sound morose, but I guess it sounds as if it is really boring to be God! But then again, boredom is very much a human feeling! Motivation is required to do anything in this universe. Now this is where I deviate. Just as how hunger, pain, fear, freedom and many other such feelings motivate all creatures to do something, humans are also motivated by these very emotions, probably more which includes "dignity of labour", "respect in society" , so on and so forth.
It is the basic instinct of curiosity that propels us to achieve something. We invented the wheel becasue we wanted to find out if it would feel good not to walk so much! We discovered fire because we wanted to know whether roasted beef tastes better than raw meat! We invented the "Blue Gene" 70.72 TerraFLOP SuperComputer probably because we wanted to know if the value of PI has a recurrence after the first 300 trillion digits!!!! :-P
We think up of stuff like the one I am writing as a as a curiosity or as a challenge to our superior minds as Homo Sapiens.But will any of this motivate God? He doesn't need to hunt or grow food, he doesn't need to know the exact value of PI. He knows that the first recurrence will occur after the first godzillian digits. :-). Nothing is challenging to God. His omnipotence requires for Him to be able to create galaxies with thousands of civilizations with the same ease as solving a simple quadratic equation!
So then, this brings us to the proverbial fork in the road... Why bother with all creation? Why create stuff in the universe and then destroy it? Why govern the universe according a set of laws and rules? Why go on with the whole charade when He knows perfectly well that He CAN do it. Is it just to prove himself of HIS capability with a practicable model? That is simply absurd and frankly, unholy!!!So then, that leaves us with the only uncomfortably logical explanation that it is his Destiny to do so!!! He HAS to do it all! He too can't escape it! So from this, we would come to the inescapable conclusion that even God is bound by Destiny, even though He has created Destiny itself! Then how does that make him omnipotent? A Catch-22 right here! If God has created the universe, then he needn't have, because there is no motivation for him to do so; but if he has created, then that would be because he was destined to do so...Now, we know for a fact that the Universe has been created and that we are a part of it!
Hence, an omnipotent GOD does not exist! Q.E.D .
I'm not an atheist....I'm only agnostic! :-D

300 Vs. TERMINATOR! Battle Royale!!!

Hi there,
Been busy lately..So haven’t been able to update. Anyways, making ammends to that right now!
Ever since I saw "Sin City", I had come to revere Frank Miller, but the day I saw the movie 300 and echoed "HO-OOH" with the men who "PREPARE FOR GLORY!", I thought Frank Miller had outdone himself. Notwithstanding that fact, director Zack Snyder also did a superb job of bringing the comic book to cinematic life!

But alas! Genius that I am (:-P), my mind could not rest and yesterday, as my friend and I sat at the office pantry, discussing various 'issues' with the existing database blah blah, the topic suddenly veered to another of my favourite movie "Terminator 2: Judgement Day" and I impishly suggested the what-if scenario when the 300 Spartans who will "Dine in Hell" encounter the "living tissue over metal endo-skeleton" of the TERMINATOR T-800! Our discussion, though unfruitful, was extremely entertaining! So I now present before you the scenario.... You give the conclusion!!! This duel was previously hosted at http://www.electricferret.com/battle/cbub_matches/727-111046.php

and was won by the Terminator by popular vote of 54 - 41.

SCENE

It is nearing daybreak but it is still dark. The battle-ready Spartans began marching this evening from their hometown Sparta and have decided to rest for the night. The Spartans have forged an alliance with the Arkadians just hours ago in their fight against the dreaded Persians. Now, the Spartans are all asleep in the open field, save a few soldiers on guard, resting their bodies for another day of marching. It has come to King Leonidus' knowledge that the fateful shore of Persian landing is five days away.

Suddenly, the soldiers on guard straighten up, all alert, as a brilliant purple glare lights up the open field around them. Wild fingers of blue-white electric arcs dance in the field a short distance away from the sleeping soldiers and all soldiers are woken up to the sound of stray electrical crackling. All soldiers are dumbfounded while King Leonidus is the lone warrior to maintain a composed face as the strange lightning forms a circular opening in mid-air, and in the sudden flare of light they see a figure in a sphere of energy with an explosive thunderclap!

Through the clearing vapor they see the figure clearly... a naked woman with burns and bruises on her body. As the electric hissing and sputtering subsides, it is replaced by a rising scream of animal agony from the woman!

As the screaming to subsides, King Leonidus is the first to recover from the shock. He swiftly orders his loyal men to help the woman, cover her up and bring her to him. They follow their king's orders and bring her to him.

LEONIDUS - "I don’t understand, my good woman! Who are you? Where did you come from? My name is King Leonidus and you are in SPARTA!"

The woman looks shocked and afraid. She scans the field frantically and looks at the men’s attire and the surroundings. She recognizes the men. A painful realization descends on her...

WOMAN - "Water!!! I need water!!!"

One soldier comes with a pitcher of water. She drinks greedily and surveys the surroundings. She is calmer now, but still fearful.

She clutches King Leonidus' gown and breathes "Has he come too? Is he here? "

LEONIDUS - "I'm afraid you will have to explain yourself woman! Who are you? And whose arrival are you enquiring about?"

WOMAN - "King Leonidus! My name is Sarah Connor. I too don't fully understand what is going on but the matter is this. I have come from the future. There is a TERMINATOR who is hell bent upon killing me. I have somehow been transported back in time by my protector Kyle Reese. Now, my attacker! He is a cyborg. A Terminator. He is a microprocessor-controlled, fully armored killing machine...."

LEONIDUS - "Silence woman!!! Is this some kind of a joke or a prank from the Persian armies? What do you mean by a Terminator or a cyborg or whatever you said?"

SARAH (pleading frantically) - "Please, my dear king, you have to believe me! The man, the thing that is after me is a cybernetic organism..."
(Shakes her head resignedly)

SARAH - "My Lord, hear me! I am from Greece! And a very very powerful human being is trying to kill me! He is from PERSIA!"

LEONIDUS - "Do not worry, Sarah! I shall have one Spartan soldier to guard you at all times from this Persian soldier whom you call 'TERMINATOR'!"

SARAH - "You do not understand! It is extremely power- ................"

At this point, the open field dazzles again in a brilliant purple glare! The air is filled in strange electrical noises and in the sudden flash of light; there is another sphere of energy at the opposite corner of the huge field! The Spartans barely see another naked figure through the clearing vapor in the distance. The TERMINATOR T-800 has come through! Physique: massive, perfect. Face: devoid of emotion. The Terminator stands and impassively surveys its surroundings...

SARAH (screaming hysterically) - It’s him!! It's him!! It's the Terminator! It's the robot!!!!

LEONIDUS - "Even the Persian should be given the honor of presenting his story before a jury!!! Dilios, Go to the Persian and help him!"

Dilios and three Arkadians run towards the Terminator to help him. Arkadian goes first - “Are you alright, my man?"

TERMINATOR POV - A digitized electronic scan of the Arkadian and the other two humans. Dilios' body is outlined, or "selected” and thousands of estimated measurements appear. His clothing has been analyzed and deemed suitable...

TERMINATOR - “I need your robes, your helmet and your wreath!"

Dilios is shocked, but thinks it is a game and decides to play along.

DILIOS - “You forgot to say PLEASE!"

At this, the Terminator calmly, and without expression, grabs Dilios with one hand and hauls him into the air! Dilios lands nimbly on the ground and attacks the Terminator with some brilliant punches and kicks. The Terminator looks at him after this volley and breaks his neck! The two Arkadians look with astonishment and trepidation and run back to the now 299 Spartans and the numerous Arkadians in a frenzy, while the Terminator calmly begins to disrobe the Spartan slowly. The Arkadians cover the distance of the huge field in minutes, panting by the time they reach the king...

ARKADIAN - "Dear Lord! He is not human! He seems to be an Immortal!"

LEONIDUS - "Immortal u say? Then let’s put his name to the test! But will he be unreasonable to our claim? After all, we are hundreds of trained soldiers with weapons!"

SARAH - “King Leonidus! Please Listen. Understand. That the Terminator is out there. It does not feel pain...It can't be reasoned with, it can't be bargained with...it doesn't feel pity of remorse or fear...and it absolutely will not stop. And now that it is here, it will go to Sparta and destroy the whole of Sparta single-handedly! It can fight your armies alone!"

LEONIDUS - "If this is true, Sarah, then I shall give you my word to protect you! I shall kill the Persian fighter with my own hands!"

SARAH - "Dear King! Please do not underestimate this man! He has the strength of a hundred humans! You will definitely die to him if you fight him with bare hands! But he can be killed by weapons like rockets or in your own time even a careful thrust with the spear to his power source can kill him. Its power source lies in his heart and the head! I just hope and pray that the combination of Spartan fighting skills and peak human strength that I have studied in my history books can help overcome the Terminator. But remember my king, you will have to strategize and adapt well. Because he has to be stopped."

LEONIDUS - "Is that what you say, Sarah! Captain! Rush to Sparta! It is only 3 hours away from here! Take Sarah with you. Alert the full army and bring reinforcements!"

LEONIDUS (loudly) - "Hear me, Spartans and Arkadians! Prepare for battle! Don your armor and wield your shields and spears! For I have given my word to the woman and we Spartans are men of our words! We now know what the Persian brute is capable of, and we shall fight him bravely and wisely! We Spartans have descended from Hercules himself. Taught never to retreat, never to surrender. Spartans: the finest soldiers the world has ever known! Prepare for glory! Pledge to crush! This is where we fight, this is where he dies!!

ARMY - “HO-OOH!!! HO-OOH!!! HO-OOH!!!"

(As the Terminator casually walks across the huge field, the Spartans get ready for battle with armor and weapons and stand in their deadly formation with their shields in position!)

TERMINATOR - "Humans, lay down your weapons.”

LEONIDUS – “Tyrant! Come and get them! "

And so.....it begins......

TRAGEDY!!!

Hi Folks!
INFOSYS. This is a name we grow up with. It is synonymous with growth, prosperity and jobs in India. Its probably associated with geeks and outsourcing abroad. We love you. We hate you. But we can never ignore you. Be it the allegations of hurting national sentiments by our noble (???) Narayan Murthy (founder and chief mentor of Infosys, or the company constantly out-doing itself in breaking records for highest number of recruits in a day , or just the plain old market capitalization of the company touching Rs 100,000 Crores (trillion)..
But I m not going to talk about these things (just now ;-) ). I know of other things too. Coz I work in Infosys Technologies Limited.
Now you might be wondering that I might begin to speak about the oft-spoken-about topic. The awesome infrastructure inside the high walls of every Infosys campus in India and abroad which are religiously guarded by overpriced guards with state-of-the-art “bug” sweepers and sniper sentry-posts. You know, those lush green football and cricket fields which host several international matches on a regular basis, or the wonderful facilities like Tennis/Basketball/Badminton/TT (ping-pong) courts or just the pleasure of walking through acres and acres of lush green vegetation amidst which one finds steel, concrete and glass behemoths housing thousands of extreme power packed workstations which would put many gaming PCs to shame. Probably some other time.
Today I m going to tell you about my aching legs and hands!
You see, there s a method to all my ranting and raving. My company (the campus which I work in particular) has invoked words of appreciation from the President of the country, admiration and regard from the Chairman of NASDAQ and the Finance Minister of India alike, even tears of pride from my mom the first time she saw it. And what’s the first and the best thing they notice and appreciate??? The beautiful and spotless landscape that is the Infosys Software Development Center, Mysore campus!
I bring to your attention and elaborate on one word that you have probably overlooked in the previous paragraph. SPOTLESS. Yes, every Infosys campus in the world can be made into an illustration of personal hygiene and care is taken to keep it that way, painstakingly so; thus offering a stark contrast to the general callousness towards cleanliness in India.
But this state of beauty comes at a price. Hordes of people work like zealots and clean every part of the campus, and this I speak literally. There’s no place which in the 320 acres of land in the Mysore center that the “Facilities” Department of the company doesn’t reach out to. When I sometimes work 18 hours a day, I sit at my cubicle and look at the people scurrying about late into the night collecting trash, arranging bric-a-brac items, scrubbing the floors and I wonder how people become such workaholics!!!
A good friend of mine told me that he had left his bike in the parking lot while he visited his native town for about 3 weeks. When he returned to office, contrary to his expectations of dirt and grime, he found his bike squeaky clean. The legendary Facilities people had cleaned his bike simply because it didn’t belong to the otherwise spotless parking lot! But few days back, my astonishment reached its peak and I stood there, stupefied, watching in amazement as two people stood on a mantel, assiduously cleaning the leaves of a tree!!! So it didn’t astound me too much, when I saw the bitumen paved tar road inside the campus, not only being swept but actually CLEANED with detergent!!!
This probably wouldn’t have caught my eye had it not been for the fact that as I was riding my bike today, immersed as I was in my thoughts about how to fudge a report about the various defects that have been injected by me in the code, I realized, albeit too late, that my bike had gone horribly out of my control and that I was about to fall. As I was falling, in those few milliseconds, I contemplated about my driving skills when the sharp odor of phenyl hit my nose and amidst shock and resignation, found out the reason for my bike slipping horrendously out of control. Who on God’s green earth washes a road with detergent?!?!?
I vowed to find answers to these apparently non-rhetorical questions later and decided to dedicate my energies towards slowing down the skidding bike and my legs along with it! My legs and hands were burning with the scratches I had amassed as I got up. I couldn’t bear to look at my bike with its handle twisted in a fiendish way. Meanwhile some people had gathered and were helping me out, as I looked around furtively towards the nearest escape in embarrassment, meanwhile thanking them profusely.
At last, I went to the clinic in the campus itself and found out to my fortune that my injuries were few and minor. I would later find out that my bike was also easily fixed. So, I realized, All’s well that ends well. Tell that to my aching back and itching legs…
PS : Such incidents were reported to the concerned authorities eventually. Few days later, as I passed by, I saw a board that read “GO SLOW. MEN AT WORK” put up at places where these regular “maintenance” activities were going on.

Great solution Geniuses!!! In the past 2 months itself, the body count has reached 30. Who s next???

Alice in Wonderland!!!

I used to think what was all the fuss about. Guys and girls; li'l ones and old ones' simply writing their hearts out. Spliling out their dreams, desires, turn-offs..Lil peals of wisdom to share, lots of rumours to spare..just a hint of controversy[ ^o) ] here and there.
Blogging - I used to think what was all the fuss about. This was before i started reading blogs. The hours whizzed past as I sat in front of my computer; I had irrevocably fallen in love with something I had previously detested and I remembered the adage - Change is the only constant in the universe.
And this was how li'l Johnny gave a late-entry into the world of blogging!
Before I say anything more clichéd and end up embarassing myself [ :-$] , I welcome you to my space. Hope you have a good time!